Smiled and laughed from top to bottom!! Don’t you just adore the contradictions we hold? I buy bamboo toilet paper but run through paper towels like theres no damn tomorrow. I consciously pick my groceries so there’s no waste and then order takeout all the nights. How can so much fit inside a single person? Yet here we are.
My mother ALWAYS drove a big suburban and she only has two children so… 🤣
Caroline!!! I’m screaming!!! I ordered 32 rolls of bamboo toilet paper and just changed out the rolls in every bathroom in our house. Annnnd we still use paper towels. Baby steps. 😭😂
I ALSO use bamboo toilet paper, no surprise. My sister came over recently and remarked on the INCREDIBLE exfoliation she experienced in our bathroom, and I don't think it was a compliment. Anything to save the planet!
I love it. The one I get comes out to be only $15 more a year or so they say…the brand is PlantPaper. Alicia Silvertone was in the commercial and it was hilarious. I’ll find it & send it in group chat tomorrow!
This was excellent!!! We contain multitudes!!!! I giggled throughout the whole piece! Your mom sounds hilarious and I loved the lipstick move 🐽💄
Wildly impressed that you can drive something so big. I loathe driving and don’t do it anymore but when I lived in Texas—only Mini Coopers for me. I had three of them over the years and they were the most fun go kart type driving experience ever.
I’m so glad you love your new car and that vanity plate is perfection. What a cute surprise. Do the boys love it?!
Isabel, you truly outdid yourself on this one. It's hilarious and makes me wish I was living inside your head. Truly! It must be the most fun in there. We also wash our zip-lock bags and drive a Subaru that looks silver but is called blue and have finally recognized that many, seemingly contradictory, things can be true at the same time.
Donna, you are the best!! Thank you for reading and humoring me. It's so fun to tease out these parts of ourselves... I'm lucky to have such generous readers who are here for it!
Woah Canyonero! Flashes from the Simpsons episode flickered in as I was reading. :)
I've been there when life changes and you've forgotten to update your mental model for travel...wait, how many humans? and this whole bag is stuffed animals? it creeps up, cumulatively.
I like how you describe the intoxication of it all - there's this allure of comfort and privilege that we're swept up in, but it looks and feels absurd when you view it from other perspectives. Tying it into Chevy ads in the Barbie movie really highlights the contradiction that was woven throughout that movie: toys trying to break out of patriarchy & consumerism systems, embracing and challenging them along the way to change. Maybe learning that to be a Real Boy/Girl we need to embody the shadow side of it all, too.
Oh god yes, the SIMPSONS they get it right every single time. The shadow side is exactly the thing: owning these strange parts of ourselves, making sense of them. I still leave Bessie parked most days, but when I do drive her I'm like, yup. I'm evil, too. It's kind of built into the human OS. And then I smile about it instead of feeling a sour twist in my guts.
I laughed so hard!!! my husband and I bought a bigger car with the excuse that we want to have children and need space, and at the same time I fight with him when he puts the recyclable trash in the wrong place! The contradictions 🫠
Okay what's WITH the recyclables in the wrong place every time? And also you have to rinse the hummus and the peanut butter before the jars go in the bin!
oh you are so much more than a billboard for "masculine bonanza" perhaps one could add "humor in the face of bewildering paradox/contradiction" which makes all of this so very interesting (and funny, and life, for us as well as the Greta Gerwigs and i agree she deserves whatever imbalanced loot there is straddling both sides of the empowerment game, this may indeed the final curtain on "patriarchy" and regardless of the plastic they are bound to exponentially consume your boys are obviously being raised with enough awareness to help be part of then solution which will figure out how that it needn't be deposited in our natural environment, perhaps recycled? but all the years in Vermont hadn't even beat into me enough guilt to as good as i should about that so....
this; "I wished Christopher was there to see Gerwig skewer the men and cars trope, but unfortunately, he was working to cover the expenses of a new baby." is in a nutshell how very lucky he is to have you and "IVBOYMOM" you to have him. Of course your Mom and Dad's styles/examples you are ALL lucky to have. What a great description all of it. My Dad used to chide me for looking like a "ragamuffin" in my ripped and torn clothing, especially hockey gear but like even sandwich bags we can fetish-ize wrappers, clothing, sometimes they are relics of an identity we cling to fiercely.....so glad there is room for the dog!!!!
Ragamuffin kids are the best. Please tell me you wore the hockey gear while NOT playing hockey? And yeah, I had a pretty cool template. Loose and free, but always loving. But Mom DID roll her eyes at this car, you better believe.
damn strsight i played in that gypsy get up but on game day dresdef up...i scored enough hat tricks to get away with it but later in life when he was no longer my coach Dad did more than roll his eyes
he could punish with the best of them and believe me i rubbed it in
my sister covered alk that pretty welm in one of her novels (its got "father" in the title 😅😅
and i was a tad crestfallen she had me driving moving vans that smelled like fried chicken than carpentry work in Vt. 🥸👹)
But also: WHY WOULD YOU NOT? They're practically eternal. Plus I think it builds character for the kids to go to school with bags that have clearly been...well loved.
I loved all the things about this post, and one thought that popped into my head while reading was "I bet laundry plays a huge role in Isabel's life." It's like a force of nature at my house, and I have only the one (girl) kid.
That machine runs 4x a day. But I do wait so that all the drying is consolidated into one load!! I've learned to love podcasts for folding. Thanks so much for being here, Rebecca!
What a delightful read! Bessie sounds like a beauty, and I love your comparison to a nursing mother
Also, your own mother sounds like an absolute gem. This line made me smile: Once, she had no paper, so she used red, Chanel lipstick. OINK OINK smeared across the glass. This is my feminist heritage.
This was so perfect! My mother's rinsed and reused ziplock bags were such an embarrassment for my sister and I when we were young. Now guess who rinses and reuses ziplocks until they fall apart (which honestly they never do) 😂
They never do!! Maybe they get some holes in the corners, but even that can be overcome by using those for larger snacks! I think it's character building to be the kid who pulls a cloudy plastic bag out of their lunch box.
It's just so funny to me that I have all these boys coming from such a matriarchy and having only a sister. Every day I wake up and I'm like, wow. God has a sense of humor.
This is absolutely hysterical. I was laughing the whole way. You seem like a really cool Mom. It's also so strange that you mentioned Bronson's Easy Rider album. As Jenovia was working last night, I was cleaning the kitchen and listening to Easy Rider (the track) on repeat. It's really the only song I really like on the whole album. There are other jams on there but that one in particular is monumental. It's either the wailing guitar that blankets the whole track or that opening line that just sets it right the fuck off " Praise the lord, I was born to drive boat". Maybe its both but together they formulate an anthem that makes me want to do fast and dangerous things (ie wheelie a dirt bike through traffic, or surf huge waves) Never would've taken you for a hip hop girl and especially Action Bronson. Nonetheless reading this made me a big fan of yours.
THANK YOU! Yeah, it's funny I should've picked up on that first line more for this piece... maybe that's why the song fits the experience of driving it so well. Because it does feel like I'm sailing over the roads in a MasterCraft. Unfortunately, even my eight year old is into hip hop now and so we have lots of lessons on language. The Kids Bop versions are just NOT THE SAME so we listen to the real stuff and hope he doesn't repeat anything :) So glad our paths have crossed!
Another comment: I keep thinking about this funny essay and Isabel what I may love the MOST is that you don't micromanage the kids clothing choices and that you upcycle clothes from others. You are teaching them so much from this....allowing them the power of choice, engaging their imaginations and creativity in what they wear, and just loving each for WHO they are. I see so many mothers crafting the " cute" syndrome in what their children wear and it is never healthy. Carry on o wise mother of 4.
All you have to do is watch a kid walk into a room to know so much about him or her. They just cross those thresholds so exuberantly and unapologetically. Every day's a chance to be a new self in a new costume. Why the heck not??
Smiled and laughed from top to bottom!! Don’t you just adore the contradictions we hold? I buy bamboo toilet paper but run through paper towels like theres no damn tomorrow. I consciously pick my groceries so there’s no waste and then order takeout all the nights. How can so much fit inside a single person? Yet here we are.
My mother ALWAYS drove a big suburban and she only has two children so… 🤣
Totally! I will die of thirst before purchasing plastic water bottle but I go through 50 post it notes a day
Haha exactly!!
Caroline!!! I’m screaming!!! I ordered 32 rolls of bamboo toilet paper and just changed out the rolls in every bathroom in our house. Annnnd we still use paper towels. Baby steps. 😭😂
It’s actually the best toilet paper…but do I complain about the price every time I put in it my cart? Yes!!
I ALSO use bamboo toilet paper, no surprise. My sister came over recently and remarked on the INCREDIBLE exfoliation she experienced in our bathroom, and I don't think it was a compliment. Anything to save the planet!
I’m going to have to disagree with her! I really think it’s a superior product…or have I been brainwashed?
I love the exfoliation aspect. PlantPaper has a soft side AND an exfoliation side. We love choices in this house!
I love it. The one I get comes out to be only $15 more a year or so they say…the brand is PlantPaper. Alicia Silvertone was in the commercial and it was hilarious. I’ll find it & send it in group chat tomorrow!
Ummm I think I’ve accidentally been buying an overpriced one and just assumed that’s what they all are. That tracks. Ordering yours in the AM!
The inside-out rinsed ziplock bags are my life! Love that little detail. It's amazing how we find things to perch them on to dry. 😄
Haha totally! Mine are drying out over water bottles at the moment.
This was excellent!!! We contain multitudes!!!! I giggled throughout the whole piece! Your mom sounds hilarious and I loved the lipstick move 🐽💄
Wildly impressed that you can drive something so big. I loathe driving and don’t do it anymore but when I lived in Texas—only Mini Coopers for me. I had three of them over the years and they were the most fun go kart type driving experience ever.
I’m so glad you love your new car and that vanity plate is perfection. What a cute surprise. Do the boys love it?!
Mini Coopers are such a delight. They're sporty and elegant and also zippy. No surprise--they're my mom's favorite car!!!
Hahaha!!! YES! Go mom!!!
Isabel, you truly outdid yourself on this one. It's hilarious and makes me wish I was living inside your head. Truly! It must be the most fun in there. We also wash our zip-lock bags and drive a Subaru that looks silver but is called blue and have finally recognized that many, seemingly contradictory, things can be true at the same time.
Thank you for this excellent essay, I loved it.
Donna, you are the best!! Thank you for reading and humoring me. It's so fun to tease out these parts of ourselves... I'm lucky to have such generous readers who are here for it!
Woah Canyonero! Flashes from the Simpsons episode flickered in as I was reading. :)
I've been there when life changes and you've forgotten to update your mental model for travel...wait, how many humans? and this whole bag is stuffed animals? it creeps up, cumulatively.
I like how you describe the intoxication of it all - there's this allure of comfort and privilege that we're swept up in, but it looks and feels absurd when you view it from other perspectives. Tying it into Chevy ads in the Barbie movie really highlights the contradiction that was woven throughout that movie: toys trying to break out of patriarchy & consumerism systems, embracing and challenging them along the way to change. Maybe learning that to be a Real Boy/Girl we need to embody the shadow side of it all, too.
Oh god yes, the SIMPSONS they get it right every single time. The shadow side is exactly the thing: owning these strange parts of ourselves, making sense of them. I still leave Bessie parked most days, but when I do drive her I'm like, yup. I'm evil, too. It's kind of built into the human OS. And then I smile about it instead of feeling a sour twist in my guts.
I laughed so hard!!! my husband and I bought a bigger car with the excuse that we want to have children and need space, and at the same time I fight with him when he puts the recyclable trash in the wrong place! The contradictions 🫠
IVBOYMOM I loved that!!
Okay what's WITH the recyclables in the wrong place every time? And also you have to rinse the hummus and the peanut butter before the jars go in the bin!
OMG YESSSS!!! Why is so hard to rinse off… I thought it was just me in this fight 😂
oh you are so much more than a billboard for "masculine bonanza" perhaps one could add "humor in the face of bewildering paradox/contradiction" which makes all of this so very interesting (and funny, and life, for us as well as the Greta Gerwigs and i agree she deserves whatever imbalanced loot there is straddling both sides of the empowerment game, this may indeed the final curtain on "patriarchy" and regardless of the plastic they are bound to exponentially consume your boys are obviously being raised with enough awareness to help be part of then solution which will figure out how that it needn't be deposited in our natural environment, perhaps recycled? but all the years in Vermont hadn't even beat into me enough guilt to as good as i should about that so....
this; "I wished Christopher was there to see Gerwig skewer the men and cars trope, but unfortunately, he was working to cover the expenses of a new baby." is in a nutshell how very lucky he is to have you and "IVBOYMOM" you to have him. Of course your Mom and Dad's styles/examples you are ALL lucky to have. What a great description all of it. My Dad used to chide me for looking like a "ragamuffin" in my ripped and torn clothing, especially hockey gear but like even sandwich bags we can fetish-ize wrappers, clothing, sometimes they are relics of an identity we cling to fiercely.....so glad there is room for the dog!!!!
Ragamuffin kids are the best. Please tell me you wore the hockey gear while NOT playing hockey? And yeah, I had a pretty cool template. Loose and free, but always loving. But Mom DID roll her eyes at this car, you better believe.
damn strsight i played in that gypsy get up but on game day dresdef up...i scored enough hat tricks to get away with it but later in life when he was no longer my coach Dad did more than roll his eyes
he could punish with the best of them and believe me i rubbed it in
my sister covered alk that pretty welm in one of her novels (its got "father" in the title 😅😅
and i was a tad crestfallen she had me driving moving vans that smelled like fried chicken than carpentry work in Vt. 🥸👹)
OMG the washing of the plastic bags!!! You’re talking about my mom. And then me as an extension.
But also: WHY WOULD YOU NOT? They're practically eternal. Plus I think it builds character for the kids to go to school with bags that have clearly been...well loved.
OMG Same!!
I enjoy washing them
I loved all the things about this post, and one thought that popped into my head while reading was "I bet laundry plays a huge role in Isabel's life." It's like a force of nature at my house, and I have only the one (girl) kid.
That machine runs 4x a day. But I do wait so that all the drying is consolidated into one load!! I've learned to love podcasts for folding. Thanks so much for being here, Rebecca!
What a delightful read! Bessie sounds like a beauty, and I love your comparison to a nursing mother
Also, your own mother sounds like an absolute gem. This line made me smile: Once, she had no paper, so she used red, Chanel lipstick. OINK OINK smeared across the glass. This is my feminist heritage.
My mom is SO RAD. I'm so glad you're here and I can't wait to go down a Baby Brain rabbit hole...
This was so perfect! My mother's rinsed and reused ziplock bags were such an embarrassment for my sister and I when we were young. Now guess who rinses and reuses ziplocks until they fall apart (which honestly they never do) 😂
They never do!! Maybe they get some holes in the corners, but even that can be overcome by using those for larger snacks! I think it's character building to be the kid who pulls a cloudy plastic bag out of their lunch box.
Your boys will certainly help prevent the growth of the patriarchy!!
It's just so funny to me that I have all these boys coming from such a matriarchy and having only a sister. Every day I wake up and I'm like, wow. God has a sense of humor.
I am still laughing and love everything about this post and your style of writing.
IVBOYMOM, you rock and wear all this complexity with the most love and genuine care!
Fabienne, I am SO GLAD you are here! Thank you for reading!!
Always such a good read! I was an only child so it was a VW bug for me....with the VW camper bus for vacations. This made me smile, Isabel! 👏👏👏👏👏
The VW camper bus? Iconic!! Those little curtains :)
This is absolutely hysterical. I was laughing the whole way. You seem like a really cool Mom. It's also so strange that you mentioned Bronson's Easy Rider album. As Jenovia was working last night, I was cleaning the kitchen and listening to Easy Rider (the track) on repeat. It's really the only song I really like on the whole album. There are other jams on there but that one in particular is monumental. It's either the wailing guitar that blankets the whole track or that opening line that just sets it right the fuck off " Praise the lord, I was born to drive boat". Maybe its both but together they formulate an anthem that makes me want to do fast and dangerous things (ie wheelie a dirt bike through traffic, or surf huge waves) Never would've taken you for a hip hop girl and especially Action Bronson. Nonetheless reading this made me a big fan of yours.
THANK YOU! Yeah, it's funny I should've picked up on that first line more for this piece... maybe that's why the song fits the experience of driving it so well. Because it does feel like I'm sailing over the roads in a MasterCraft. Unfortunately, even my eight year old is into hip hop now and so we have lots of lessons on language. The Kids Bop versions are just NOT THE SAME so we listen to the real stuff and hope he doesn't repeat anything :) So glad our paths have crossed!
Another comment: I keep thinking about this funny essay and Isabel what I may love the MOST is that you don't micromanage the kids clothing choices and that you upcycle clothes from others. You are teaching them so much from this....allowing them the power of choice, engaging their imaginations and creativity in what they wear, and just loving each for WHO they are. I see so many mothers crafting the " cute" syndrome in what their children wear and it is never healthy. Carry on o wise mother of 4.
All you have to do is watch a kid walk into a room to know so much about him or her. They just cross those thresholds so exuberantly and unapologetically. Every day's a chance to be a new self in a new costume. Why the heck not??