So excited for you! I was always taught that social frankness lacks virtue. It’s been exciting to learn that that’s not always true and to experience freedom from my emotional “weights.”
In my experience, taking responsibility(first step in letting go of unhealthy baggage) for our choices/regrets is painful & yet freeing. Telling "truths" is tricky...my "truth" may not be THE truth; perceptions can be relative, my perception can be a long way from that of the other participant's. Truth is the essential path to forgiveness, our own & forgiving others. The consequences of our "putting it out there" is often a price too high to pay all at once, but may be best handled in installments... Children will almost never do what you say: They will almost always do what they see. They are also forgiving and generous with those they love...trust them & they will not disappoint you, nor will they write a tell all book about your struggles during their childhood (boys don't do that, girls do;) I didn't get "hooked" on J. Didion until the grief I felt after the deaths of all my loved ones made me feel hopeless & frightened. Her writing brought me away from the edge when nothing else would...keep writing, Isabel, it is your most powerful tool to help people...and that, my dear, is why we were put on this planet...❤️, the old school teacher
Yes... I remember we spoke about this once. So interesting how people in the same family can remember their lives so differently, for example. For me it's okay to have different truths if our bedrock is compassion... we come at things differently, we respect each other's memories, realizing, of course that memory is informed by everything that happened since (most of it unrelated). I say this, but my children have not yet written their memoirs. We'll see if my tune changes when they do :)
Ha! Going to Stella Adler, where Pappy studied... I think? Have you plunged your arm into that Bethlehem foxhole?? I want to hear what those men have to say about it.
Haven't been to Bethlehem in many weeks, going up next weekend. Hopefully the foxholes will be snowed under and I won't have to make good on my self dare. I remember when you were last studying acting in NYC. At the time you were very very happy with it.
God, yes. Just let them grow up joyful and free. The world will likely crush it out of them for a spell, but my hope is they'll get back to themselves. I'm not sure everybody makes that return... I am lucky. Thank you for being here :)
Very inspiring! Thank you ❤️
Thank you, Francine!!
So excited for you! I was always taught that social frankness lacks virtue. It’s been exciting to learn that that’s not always true and to experience freedom from my emotional “weights.”
Why why why didn't I just ask, "Who says?"
Love. Love love love.
In my experience, taking responsibility(first step in letting go of unhealthy baggage) for our choices/regrets is painful & yet freeing. Telling "truths" is tricky...my "truth" may not be THE truth; perceptions can be relative, my perception can be a long way from that of the other participant's. Truth is the essential path to forgiveness, our own & forgiving others. The consequences of our "putting it out there" is often a price too high to pay all at once, but may be best handled in installments... Children will almost never do what you say: They will almost always do what they see. They are also forgiving and generous with those they love...trust them & they will not disappoint you, nor will they write a tell all book about your struggles during their childhood (boys don't do that, girls do;) I didn't get "hooked" on J. Didion until the grief I felt after the deaths of all my loved ones made me feel hopeless & frightened. Her writing brought me away from the edge when nothing else would...keep writing, Isabel, it is your most powerful tool to help people...and that, my dear, is why we were put on this planet...❤️, the old school teacher
Yes... I remember we spoke about this once. So interesting how people in the same family can remember their lives so differently, for example. For me it's okay to have different truths if our bedrock is compassion... we come at things differently, we respect each other's memories, realizing, of course that memory is informed by everything that happened since (most of it unrelated). I say this, but my children have not yet written their memoirs. We'll see if my tune changes when they do :)
Great insights into your children’s view and understanding
I remember this coming up in your comments to the last book I wrote... we see so much in how we parent. I will never forget that insight.
Beautiful! Follow your bliss wherever it leads.
Ha! Going to Stella Adler, where Pappy studied... I think? Have you plunged your arm into that Bethlehem foxhole?? I want to hear what those men have to say about it.
Haven't been to Bethlehem in many weeks, going up next weekend. Hopefully the foxholes will be snowed under and I won't have to make good on my self dare. I remember when you were last studying acting in NYC. At the time you were very very happy with it.
Isabel, what you describe in your last two lines I believe is one of the most important things we can communicate to our children. Brava! xo
God, yes. Just let them grow up joyful and free. The world will likely crush it out of them for a spell, but my hope is they'll get back to themselves. I'm not sure everybody makes that return... I am lucky. Thank you for being here :)
my pleasure, entirely